Things They Don’t Tell You in “Author School”

As if there was one. Well, in a way, there are. Workshops like Dreamspinner Press holds every year. I just don’t leave home much, so things like that aren’t really a good fit for me. I can’t stand to be away from my dog, nor she me. Plus, I’m super introverted, and it’s hard to put on my “public persona.”

Swag. I understand it, but I don’t. Authors go to conferences and give out stuff, 90% of which is immediately tossed out. The author spent loads of bucks for someone to look at their swag as it falls down into the trash receptacle. Bookmarks? Who uses them nowadays? It’s hard to mark your place with a physical bookmark on an e-reader. Postcards? Yeah, right. I’m going to write to someone with the cover of your book on the other side of my message. Pens are nice, but they’re pretty expensive. If you want to give out 300 or so pens, it could cost you around $600 (depending on where you get them). Are you going to get $600 worth or more of sales back? I don’t really know.

I’m going to be attending Rust City Book Convention in August, and I’ve decided to do a charity basket. Now, this I can get behind. I’m having fun coming up with ideas that match my weird little worlds I’ve created. A few books, lots of ghostie stuff, and I’m looking around for a plush bulldog I can make look like a zombie.

Who the hell wouldn’t want a plush Daisy the zombie bulldog?


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